Aha, I finally learned how to get my pictures out of the Kodak file and onto my blog. I made copies and filed them under My Pictures. Now isn't that simple yet my mind didn't grasp it until just the other day. Yes, you can teach old dogs new tricks.
Yesterday I leaned my diagnosis and what to expect in the future. It's not good news but I'm glad I finally know what is going on with my crazy body and the reason for all my falling. I have Sensorimotor polyneuropathy, moderate to marked in severity. The nerves in my body are covered with myelin coating as is everybody's. The problem is, my myelin coating is becoming unraveled, exposing the nerves and the nerves can die off. I have lost quite a bit of muscle mass in my arms and legs, and my body seems to want to cave in so I feel as though my top half is melting into my hip area. There is no cure, it gets progressively worse, just a wasting away of my body until I become dependent on others at the later stages.
My doctor wants me to go to a hospital in Boston to be tested to see how far this has gone, what to expect and my time in order to settle things here. Believe me, I'm not going to take this sitting down. At least not until I have to. In the mean time, I'm going to enjoy each day and raise hell if I feel like it. Now at least people will know I'm not drunk, never have been and never will be. I'll miss my speech when that time comes but hubby will get a rest from my nagging. See, there are good and bad with this disease. But while I can make my wishes known, I'll make them loud and clear! I am lion, hear me roar...
Today is going to be another hot one and there is little I can do about it. I have an appointment at the bank at two but really don't want to go out in the stifling heat. I went to the doctor yesterday and it was all I could do to just get in and out of the car. I was going for a loan today but now I don't think that's such a good idea.
On a happy note, we had some rain yesterday, not much but enough to perk up the flowers a bit. I went out and tried to use the hose to water them but gave up the battle after getting tripped up twice. I can't chance falling on the concrete patio. Hubby can't lift me and he gets so worried when I do something like that. Hungarian logic here. It just hasn't sunk in yet, losing weight is from losing muscle mass.
The skunks are nightly visitors now and each son and hubby have a very bright flashlight to use when going out and back and forth to the garage. I can't help it, they have never bothered me and I am not afraid of them. As a matter of fact, I am accused of bringing them here with my love of critters, especially wildlife. My dream is to have an owl come and light upon the back of my lawn chair. I love owls and my den is covered with limited editions of famous wildlife photographers and painters art work. It is my favorite room and my sanctuary even though small, I feel blessed among such beautiful pictures.
My son asked me if I would like to take a cruise while able and I would, but know hubby couldn't and wouldn't make it. He is presently trying to sell a nice boat and motor with the trailer. After buying it and working so hard to bring it to it's glory, he went out on the water only to get sea sick. Not once but twice. The kids said they didn't really need bait for the fishing, Dad's upchucking was enough. And to think he used to be in the Navy and on ships for 6 years.
To be honest, I'd rather be alone in a pine forest just to smell the heavenly scent of pine and nap a little. The last time I did that was in Colorado and I woke up to find three deer checking me out from behind the Aspen trees. To say I was delighted is an understatement. I should carry a sketch pad when I do things like that. I'm no artist but at least I could try.
I would like to make it to New Mexico to see my brother's place one last time but have difficulty breathing there. It never used to bother me but we tried a few years ago and I was miserable. It's so beautiful there with the mountains, and the sunsets are pure beauty in the highest sense of the word. I so loved going there in the RV and staying a month while hubby worked with Reid and I read to my hearts content. I used to make Reid's runs to the hardware store from Chama, New Mexico to just over the Colorado Border in a lovely town full of hot springs. The drive was heaven, a road and I do mean road which took me through Indian Reservation land with nothing to enjoy but mountains and pure blue skies with the most gorgeous cloud formations. I did get caught up in one of their flash floods and just made it past where the road caved in. Thank God I was on the way back to the ranch. I had to stop for about 15 minutes until it was over. I have never seen such a heavy rain in all my life. You know, I made at least 6 trips and never met another car and just once a very old truck. The road was known for washouts but I didn't know it then.
The cats need my attention and I feel like sitting in the shade with a book and a breeze. I don't think that's possible with the humidity but I said I feel like, not I'm going to.
You all have a nice day and stay cool. Drink lots of water and have some quiet time with loved ones tonight.
Hugs
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