Wednesday, November 25, 2009

Well, That's Over and Done With!


Well, yesterday was THE day.
I went and had the breast biopsy. What an experience!!! I have had them in 95, 97, 2001, 2005, 2007, and then yesterday. I was geared to be cut, etc. and was prepared for all the pain. Well this time was a real eye opener. They now do it a new way.

After I had my vitals taken by a pleasant young man, he wanted to take me to the ER because my blood pressure was 140/98. It sure shocked me too. I'm usually 120/78-82. When upset it can go up to 130 but not higher... I told him to just get started and I was sure it would come down. I had only taken my blood pressure medicine on the way to the hospital and it probably hadn't kicked in yet. Plus the stress so it was not that unusual.

They got me situated on a table with a huge hole in it and there I was, lying on my stomach with my boob hanging down through the hole. They had to take pictures and do calculations so they could hone in on the spot. The young man was sitting down beside the table patting my arm for support. It took them a while to find the spot and make calculations, meanwhile I'm still ahanging. Finally the doctor scoots down after they raised the bed and sits underneath and starts with the Novocaine. By then I'm so sore from the size 42JJ boob just hanging in space, my armpit starts throbbing let alone that lone boob. It felt as if it was pulling part of my chest wall along with it.

The doctor starts telling me what he is doing as he goes along and keeps asking, "Are you alright Joyce?" I tell him I'm doing fine and just do what he has to and quit treating me as if I'm glass and will break. He started chuckling and told me, "I was easy." The cute young technician is still sitting beside me patting my arm and I feel like a deer must feel when it's caught in the headlights of an oncoming car. All in all it took 35 minutes from start to finish. Well 50 minutes because they had to get me situated on that crazy bed just right. The Doctor told me I was an excellent patient and he wished all were like me. He said it took the least amount of time of any that he had done so far, and I was super. Nothing bothered me except the embarrassment of having that cute young thing beside me the whole time. If only I could have pulled a sheet over my head! I honestly told him I never felt the Novocain because I was so numb to begin with, also didn't feel the long needle he warned me about inserting in order to cut and suck out the biopsy tissue. I only felt the pressure of the sucking motion as they cleaned the area as they went along. In my head I was picturing a poor cow with it's udder caught between two large rocks, and to be truthful, I uttered out loud a very good "Mooooo." Talk about comic relief! We were all laughing. Thank God I chose the safest time to do it. That wouldn't have gone over too well during the cutting process.

Once up and off the table with my pin inserted for further use in case the biopsy comes back and needs further surgery, I got dressed. Can you believe it, they inserted a piece of jewelry inside my boob? How special I am. I came home, iced for 20 minutes, took a Tylenol and then fell asleep in the chair , and woke up 7 hours later. I'm telling you, if only I had known. I just can't do any lifting, vacuuming, aerobics, etc. for two days. As if I'd want to...

Once Dr. Monte left the room, the gal in charge showed me my pictures, (X-rays), and the tissue they removed for biopsy. My gosh, it looked like 3D roads on a map lying in the little covered dish. I should know the results Friday, at least I hope so. Now I'm fine, just typing with my left arm close to my side but otherwise fine.
Let me tell you, they certainly have improved upon biopsies of the breast. It's just embarrassing lying there with a huge boob hanging for so long and a cute young technician sitting beside me through it all. I told him to take my blood pressure now and he laughed. I was so tired from not sleeping I was just dozing while I had the opportunity.

Hubby bought me a box of Russell Stover chocolates, I'm diabetic but the temptation broke me down. I took two and told him he was going to have to eat the rest. What punishment!! Somehow homemade fudge sounds a lot better.
This morning I woke up expecting to list to the right but so far so good. This old ship still sails, a few dips here and there, but still sailing. Friday I will get the results but I'm hopeful and looking forward to more happy days of cleaning house. Now anybody who knows me knows that's a crock!
Have a great day everyone and if there are any males reading, I hope I didn't freak you out. I tried to be gentle...Smile.

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